Doula-Up, Duchess

By Doula Jen

Princess Kate babyWithin the month, the Royal Baby will be born! You know—Wills and Kate’s tot, third in line for the throne, occupant of the most photographed belly bump in tabloid history.

While there continues to be breathless discussion of pram shopping, plans for the final birth announcement, and possible names, I find myself preoccupied with other aspects of this woman’s pregnancy.

So, Kate…Your Highness, Princess, Duchess, Countess, Mama-to-Be…here are this postpartum doula’s wishes for you…

I hear that you plan to birth naturally, with your husband right by your side. And I hear that you plan to breastfeed! Excellent! May you have the birth of your dreams with enough flexibility to roll with it when not everything goes as planned. (It never goes exactly as planned). 

Breastfeeding is awesome…really. It’s the ultimate bond and a gift to the mother as well as the child. It is the most natural thing in the world, but for some women, it doesn’t immediately come naturally. You need help and support. I hope there is a confident Lactation Consultant on hand to help you and Little One smooth the kinks in the nursing relationship. I hope that someone is there to help you learn and furthermore learn to love the relationship. And I hope that they’re not too intimidated by your status to go “hands-on” in helping you achieve the perfect latch. Breasts are just breasts, after all, even when they belong to a princess.

I hope that you are allowed space and privacy in which to enjoy long, quite moments with your child and plenty of skin-on-skin. 

I hope that you let yourself cry. Duchess, this is hard for everyone. I hope that the fact that you have EVERYTHING at your fingertips doesn’t muddy your perspective. You don’t need everything. You need to be real and honest with yourself. You do seem grounded and smart and strong. May you find the strength to cut through the BS and ignore the buzz, push away the fawners, and ask for what you really need.

I hope that a doula or at least a doula-like close friend (perhaps Pippa) makes you a smoothie, pulls your hair out of your face, and reminds you to do your Kegels. 

Having a baby is HUGE–a pivotal moment, an unparalleled transition, a game changer. It is a strange and wonderful shift, challenging enough without delivering and caring for the future King or Queen of England. The world is watching, Kate. Were I there, as your postpartum doula, I would draw the curtains and draw you a bath. May you and your intimates shut the crazy world out and allow the space to rest, recover, connect, and bond.